Kim Kardashians Golden vagina

1 Nov

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I was looking foward to blogging about basketball but sadly thanks to this greed filled lockout not much to say.  The season was scheduled  to open today and the biggest NBA news is Kim Kardashian files for divorce from NJ Nets Kris Humphries.  So this brings me to share a theory of mine.  I believe that Kim Kardashian has a midas pussy,  everything it touches turns to gold.  First look at her career sure she’s the daughter of one of OJ Simpsons lawyers from that famous trial.  It wasn’t even the cool lawyer, then she’d be Kim Cockhran which is a fitting lastname.  So no one heard of this chick until she pulls a Paris Hilton amateur porn tape.  Once that hit the internet we all knew who she was.  Let’s be honest you downloaded the clip I admit I did for blogging research of course, perverts!  So her magical vagina kicked off a multimillion dollar empire.  Kim’s made more money off sex then all of Charlie Sheens prostitutes combined.  For a chick who’s done nothing except sex on camera once she’s done pretty good for herself.  Her goods have so much influence that even the rest of the Kardashian family is cashing in on it.  The E network should have a golden mold of her cooch in front of their headquarters the way they pimp her out.  Now for an analysis of her midas touch through the men that once had it.  Her soon to be ex-husband Kris Humphries had his best season with Kim, coincedence I think not.  Kris also got tons of tv time on Kardashians reality tv show, considering no one watches the Nets this got him some recognition.  Too bad it took all but two months of marriage for this guy to lose that midas touch.  How’d Kim and up marrying this dude anyway, her sisterbrother landed 3 time champ Lamar Odom. Maybe that nickname of his “Incredible Hump” really isn’t a play on his name.  Speaking of sex Kims costar in porno was Ray J who’s only claim to fame is being Brandys little brother.  What did he gain you ask? Well he got a new label “the guy who banged Kim Kardashian on internet” substantial improvement over “brandys little brother”.  He also had his own show for awhile on VH1 which means he jumped from a Z-lister to a D-lister.  Next we have Reggie Bush who was a star football player before Kim.  However under the influence of her vagina he helped the saints win a superbowl.  Life after Kim was not so kind his career stunk, lost his heismen trophy due to a scandal, got traded to worst team in NFL.  Then this Saturday he’s spotted having dinner with Kim and Walaah!  The following day he has his best game in years.  That is one powerful pussy folks, its changed more lives then the make a wish foundation.  One day well find out Kim Kardashian holds the cure to cancer between her legs too bad you have to contract an std in the tradeoff.

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